Saturday, June 1, 2013

Changing Friendships

In the last few years, since dealing with infertility and the loss of my sons, many friendships have evolved. Some are stilted, some are stronger, some have stayed relatively the same. Only recently have I come to realize that one friend has stepped away and possible out of my life. I might be able to cope with the drifting apart if I didn't have to hear about/see photos of this friend with another very close friend. The three of us used to be super tight...apparently they still are but I am the third wheel that has been cut loose. Messages unanswered, invitations not extended...I finally got the hint. Damn it sucks! More than I want it to...I am not sure I have the energy to mourn a friendship when I am still trying to figure out how to mourn my sons.

On a more positive note, I am super excited to meet virtual friends in real life. This group of women, some I know, some I don't...share the common bond of loss. We found each other online and have created a sort of virtual support group...and the chance to be together feels pretty monumental. I am giddy with the excitement and nervousness that comes with meeting new people...even if I kind of know them already.

3 comments:

  1. Hey, I just wanted to extend some encouragement to you regarding changing friendships. We change all the time (and loss makes for some rapid, big changes) and that means that our relationships change. Throughout last year I hardly had any friends left and it was so sad and discouraging. But in hindsight I can see how some of those relationships were not positive anymore. Then suddenly I met one awesome new person after another and my social calendar is now very full!

    Hang in there because new friendships are out there! And maybe set some filters so you don't see photos of gatherings you are missing out on, because seeing that stuff is brutal.

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  2. I can completely relate.. sending love and light your way my friend

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  3. So sorry about the loss of your friendship. Hope you're able to find friends that strengthen & encourage you during this time of your life. Hope you had an amazing time meeting your virtual friends, was it the group that met up in Chicago? Wish & Ian and I could have been there, maybe another time!

    Hope the sleep issues in your home are improving. I hear you on the sleep deprivation, it makes me feel like a different person altogether when we're coping with lack of sleep.

    Thank you for your kind words and thoughts, your comment meant a lot to me:)

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