That is what I feel like this week. School is super busy and I feel like I do not get a moment to sit, but I know that I do, and it shows no signs of letting up. This isn't necessarily a bad thing (barely had a second to feel down) but the school stress is going to get pretty thick from now until May 24th.
The short list of things going on are the prepping for and setting up the art show (on May 24th), working through my summative evaluation (fingers crossed it is fabulous and they grant me tenure), taking inventory of my supplies and prepping a supply order for next year. It doesn't look like a lot, but the art show is going to take a huge amount of my energy that I don't really have a whole lot to begin with. I know it will all work out somehow.
To get me through the next couple of weeks I am evaluating all the places that I can cut back to make it as easy as I can. I will definitely continue to get prepared meals (non-frozen) from a grocery delivery service. I haven't had the gumption to cook since we lost the boys and this is a way for us to eat healthy meals that are made with quality ingredients. I have also decided to limit outside appointments and meetings to the bare minimum. I will keep up my therapy appointments, but will skip the next 2 bereavement groups. I wasn't so excited about going anyway so I think this is better in the long run. Plus there are alot of contract related meetings (board of ed, PTA, council & union meetings) that I will not go to...yes I should since this is year 3 without a contract and things are getting tenuous, but something has to give in order for me to survive.
I must send out a huge thank you for all of the wonderful comments I have received lately. So many have touched my heart. The love and support I feel from you, women who are practically strangers (in the real life sense) that are so understanding. A million thank yous!
Two pieces of my heart that are gone forever and a new piece that brought back joy.
One strange side effect of my grief was how quickly and easily I could suddenly prioritize what I had to do and what I could let go. It's the only way to survive, I guess. And I totally hear you on the meal thing--appetite has been a struggle for me, let alone having the energy and inclination to actually MAKE something myself. I am glad you've found a way to take care of the necessities and let the rest go until later.
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