Saturday, December 17, 2011

Umm...what?

That is precisely what I said to the nurse today when she called to give me the results of my blood work today.

At this moment I am pregnant. I have to keep saying it to believe it. I was sure I wasn't when I woke up this morning and I was a doubter as they did the blood draw and I certainly was not convinced when I heard the nurse say that I have to go back in on Monday to see if my beta doubles.

Of course, true to form, there was a slight hitch in the news...my prog.esterone levels are on the low side of ok so I have to increase that and see how it goes.

I know all to well that this is just the first step towards a real, live, take home baby. There are so many things that have to happen in the first month alone (2nd beta with doubling, u/s to see fetal pole, u/s to see a heartbeat , etc). I am trying so hard to focus on the next step and not let myself get to far down the line of worry.

I know that my fear and worries will have to be addressed as they pop up. That is inevitable...but I don't want that to cloud this pregnancy. I want to celebrate each second because I have no idea how long it will last or what the result will be.

For right now, in this moment I am pregnant. Wow. I am happy, scared, shocked, nervous and just trying to take it all in.

9 comments:

  1. BFP! Woohoo! Praying this is the start of a very wonderful journey for you!! Huge hugs!

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  2. Oh honey I am thrilled for you... and completely understand the anxiety that comes with each step. Hoping big hopes for you.. xo!

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  3. I've been thinking of you and am so thrilled that you've tested positive. You are right, you will have to take things as they come, but for now, know that I'm sending you big hugs of congratulations.

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  4. OMG!!! This is great news! I'm so happy for you!
    MissC

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  5. Yay! Keeping my fingers crossed for an easy 9 months!

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  6. Zomg! So hopeful for you! It is easy to get overwhelmed by the fear and anxiety, but I hope you can take it one breathe at a time, all the way to a healthy, happy baby (babies?). Wishing you all the best.

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  7. WoW! This is fantastic news. Super, incredibly amazing news. :) I know it's a long road, but we can't accomplish great things and achieve our dreams if we don't take risks to get there. Wishing you so well.

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  8. Woohoo!!! Sending you great big hugs of happiness today!

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